Looking Back on the Lessons of the Lovers Tarot Card

Hello 2014. It is difficult to say if last year lived up to its tarot numerological promises. (See last post on 'Lovers' Year'). On one hand, it certainly did in the relationship department, albeit it being very short-lived. It just so happened that the glorified friends that were mentioned as being exemplars of being bold and taking the plunge into contestable relationships also found their relationships unraveling at the end of 2013.....

Three out of the five of the 'relationship heroines' seemed to be heading toward - or are already suffering, perhaps - the fate that I myself had. Does this mean that being bold and fearless and taking the plunge and going with the heart instead of the head doesn't necessarily pay off? What happened and why did we fail so miserably? 

What I learnt out of this experience, painful as it was, was that each year's lesson stays with you and becomes a part of you after it is learnt. Looking back now, I can see that the shattered promises of my relationship has now become a part of me. Not in a negative way though. Perhaps I was over-optimistic that the relationship challenge, if overcome, would guarantee blissful permanence unto the rest of my life. But it turns out that the universe has a timing system. Perhaps it wasn't meant to be. For now, or forever. We don't know, do we? Not until the universe thinks it is time to reveal the outcome. Or when we ourselves are ready. It is no doubt a valuable lesson learnt, and integrated, if we are lucky enough to live through it. 

The Lovers tarot card is all about choices. How do we know if we are making the right choice? Looking back, it seems as though we're drawn to making that choice, or taking the plunge no matter what at that time. I don't think anyone can resist that opportunity, or that magnetic force, and would've plunged against all odds or amidst all voices of dissent. The lesson of the Lovers card was about making an important relationship choice in order to purge our demons and previous inhibitions. 

Me and my BFF went through the same thing this year peculiarly, as our fates are more or less tied together sharing the same Life numbers and Year numbers. We both went through the painful lesson of the Lovers year. It's hard to say if it signifies 'The End' to that particular relationship that we were drawn to purge. But at least we know we are put through a challenge that we could not overcome at this moment, due to timing, practical constraints, value differences etc. What drew us to these difficult and contestable relationships in the first place? Karma, supposedly. It's the only explanation that makes sense. Perhaps we thought that the Lovers year was a time of culmination for our relationships - since it lured us to take the plunge no matter how improbable or controversial right? Everyone said 'No, it won't work!' 'No, he's not suitable!' 'No, you can do better!' 'No, please reconsider!' Somehow we are driven to stick with our choices anyway, because we believe that we can finally overcome our difficulties with our steely determination and strong free will. And so we take the plunge....and we get hurt because indeed, like everyone said, it did not work out. 

What did we learn from this? That we shouldn't have taken the risk? That we should've been more practical to begin with? That we should've listened to other people's practical advice because we weren't objective enough? That we could've prevented all this pain and misery in the first place if we just resisted acting on our impulses? 

It's so difficult to say whether there are regrets or not in our choices last year. I think we were really meant to take the plunge and go with our heart's true desire. I think it was meant to cost us blood, sweat and tears. That's all a part of the package of the year's lesson. To learn to deal with the excruciating pain that comes with the delectable passion is part of the deal. As to how this lesson is integrated into our future lives.....I can say that perhaps we have to believe in Divine Timing and that there are forces beyond our control. We are very diminutive in this regard. We may be able to control our external environment in many ways, ie: we work hard to make a good living, we study hard to gain a good education......but there is one thing that is outside our control - relating to others. When it comes to human interaction, there is nothing we can do when the Other does not comply. We may try hard to persuade, to impress, to serve, and to love, but ultimately, we cannot control what the Other thinks. We may think that what we are doing is good for both of us, or what we are sacrificing is enough to get us through life's difficulties, but the Other may not think it is enough, and may not be fulfilled as it is. The lesson of the Lovers card is that relating to others is perhaps the most difficult lesson of all. Because we simply cannot control what others think and do. And that is completely baffling and painful to those of us who have had our whole entire lives under control. Or maybe we think we do, until this moment when we finally encounter something we cannot change, no matter how hard we try. Others, just like us, have a free will and Divine Timing of their own, and that is fair enough. 

A lesson of relating to others is invaluable, and it has made us more humble, less self-centred, less complacent, and more considerate for the rest of our lives. 

Tarot Numerology I: Year of the Lovers Card

I can't believe it's been more than 2 years since I last posted!! By now I've already finished my PhD and embarked on my teaching and publishing career. It's been such a long and insightful journey. When I first started my blog in 2009, I was in my 1st Year of PhD and it was my 'Justice' year in the tarot numerology (Year 11). For those who don't know, how you calculate your tarot year is much like how you would calculate your classic numerology year, that is, by adding your birth date and the year in question (eg: if someone was born on 1st of January, then you add 1 +1 + 2013 = 2015, then 2 + 0 + 1 + 5 = 8, and your tarot year is '8', meaning 'Strength'). The key difference between tarot numerology and classic numerology is that instead of ending at '9' and starting again at '1' to mark 9-year cycles, in tarot numerology, you retain the 2-digits instead of adding it all up to single digits. For instance, '10' would not be 1 + 0 = 1, but would be just '10', which is a 'Wheel of Fortune' year of new beginnings - same connotation as a Year 1 in classic numerology.

When I first began my PhD journey, I was in my 'Wheel of Fortune' year (Year 10), and very fittingly, I was embarking on a completely new vocation, in new surroundings, and meeting new people. The Wheel of Fortune also has very auspicious connotations, which is true, considering that those were very vivid and eventful years of my life - and obtaining the PhD itself is life-changing in every respect, and opened up a whole new world of opportunities for me. The years that followed were 'Justice' (11), 'Hanged Man' (12), 'Death' (13), and 'Hierophant' (5). In my Justice year, I was busy socializing the entire year with my newly made friends and coursemates. All in all, it was a hugely social year and it was a time of partnerships and collaborations, and learning how to relate to other people and make adjustments in my own attitudes in the course of it. Looking back, I would say that I did learn alot about myself through relating with others, as I had never been in such a collective environment before, living in a college dorm for the first time in my life! It was a new experience for me, having to engage so closely with other people, whether in college, in my living environment, or in my faculty where I went to work everyday (remember the infamous 'attic'?!) I had to totally fine-tune my previous loner existence.....and I had to learn to make compromises and accommodate other people's needs and to be more easygoing and less formidable or fastidious (classic Virgo defects). I had a few falling outs with friends as I was learning my lessons, but I'm grateful that our friendship survived and we've managed to become lifelong friends after we've all graduated.

In the year that followed, which was my Hanged Man year (12), I turned completely within and started to delve really seriously into spiritual phenomena, such as tarot, angel cards, meditation, and books on past life regression. It was a hugely spiritual year with long-lasting effects, as I could still call upon the knowledge I acquired back then whenever I felt lost and needed some guidance from Above. In my Death year (13), I was finishing up my PhD, so it definitely signaled an ending of my student life, and to the years of research on my thesis. I remember it wasn't particularly painful as all Death years suggested, because it was a natural progression that I was to finish, and I welcomed the prospect immensely. However, it was a stressful and emotionally high-strung year precisely because I was rushing to finish. I was glad that I had the preparation from the year before, and that I could utilize my spiritual tools to help me get through that stressful period. Finally, last year I began a new chapter of my life in my Hierophant year (5). You might ask why it came back to 5 instead of 14, following the year 13. It just so happened that 5 appeared when adding up 2012 to my birthdate; this suggested that I was not yet ready to embark on a Temperance year (14) yet, and had to begin again at 5 and learn the lessons of the Hierophant. But in my next cycle in 2020, I will have a chance to embark on a Year 14 and learn the lessons of Temperance. Meanwhile, my last Hierophant year (5) was really all about learning and teaching and adapting to established systems and traditional structures. Upon graduation, I had joined a university as a teaching staff, and was a member of a most established institution if there ever was one. In that same year, I also found myself being quite conventional in all other areas of my life.....and yet I was to rebel against all of these in my Lovers year.

I already felt the inklings of the Lovers year (6) towards the middle of December 2012. If Hierophant year is about established thoughts and taken for granted assumptions about what is right and what is wrong, then Lovers year is about asking yourself if you genuinely identify with these ongoing conventions on a soul level, and if you're denying yourself the chance to choose differently than everyone else. I had always thought that I was 'conventional' in a lot of ways, and that my life was going to follow a very 'conventional' trajectory. My idea was that I was going to have a stable career that brought me a decent living and good social status. Being a college professor was definitely going to get me there. In the area of personal life, I envisioned myself marrying someone who was a few years older, had a promising and stable career, and a good-natured and reliable temperament. In other words, someone who was quite 'conventional' in every way. A lot of my friends are living that type of life, shouldn't I be aspiring towards the same? My parents would certainly like that, as they too lead very 'conventional' lives. I made a promise to my parents - and mostly to myself, fair enough - last year that I'd live my life that way, that I'd choose the most stable path - in life and love. But into my Lovers year, I was jerked out of my comfort zone, and I suddenly realized how unconventional my dreams and aspirations really were! For instance, my PhD topic itself on 'leftover' women in China's marriage market was totally controversial - nothing boring and generic there. The fact that I composed an article in a scholarly journal on such an un-scholarly and popular topic was another tell-tale sign. On top of that, I made a video abstract for my paper which had skits edited into it, which was a complete breakthrough as it rendered previously serious journal article abstracts entertaining for the very first time. Surely there is nothing conventional about any of these actions. This certainly warrants my being with someone who also wasn't 'conventional' in that sense; someone who had big, bold and far-reaching dreams, and wasn't afraid to pursue them. Someone who - I discovered in retrospect - was always one step ahead, and tried to tell me so time and time again, but of course, I had lacked the vision and experience to understand back then. But with the initiation into the Lovers year, it all becomes clear to me, as I gradually and irrevocably shed all of my previous inhibitions and become imbued with unprecedented courage and determination to choose according to my heart's true desire.

I owe it to my bold, audacious, and inspirational girlfriends SH, AL, WK & KL who have remained true to themselves in spite of challenges and controversy, and had the guts to follow their hearts and their instincts steadfastly, which has eventually led them to be with their one True Love. 

Birthday Resolution by Tarot

I was doing an exercise in my new tarot workbook by Mary K. Greer. Incidentally, last night, on the eve of my b'day, I've come to the exercise: 'pick 3 cards that most resemble your best qualities'. It tells you to pick around 20ish to choose from, and surely I did, as it wasn't easy to pick just THREE out of 78 cards! I was using my new deck of cards - the Legacy of the Divine Tarot. Luckily I had been doing quite a few exercises in the book already, which include finding my Birth Card, Year Card, Sun Sign Card; also I had been picking 3 cards every other night to check my energies of that day. So I do have some ideas about which cards best represent me.......

It came down to 3 cards: Page of Swords, The Hermit, and The Magician.

Page of Swords was a card that came up several times when I was testing my energies. It stands for mental agility, creative ideas and constant learner. I am definitely a constant learner in that regard. I can't say that at this moment I've attained the advanced mental qualities of Queen of Swords or King of Swords.....just yet. But as of now, the Page is what I'm working on. I was trying to choose between Ace of Swords and Page of Swords, as both recurred the same number of times, but I decided that I want to identify with the Page more, which is more 'gentle' and 'mild' in nature. The Ace of Swords also signifies mental agility, but is more 'sharp' or 'caustic', somewhat flimsy and volatile like the Knight (of Swords, mutable sign). I would rather my wit be mildly modest and good-naturedly inquisitive rather than caustic and formidable.

The Hermit is the card of Sun in Virgo, which is moi! I am coming more and more to identify with The Hermit as I age. It implies going inside to find the answers, to find knowledge and attain spiritual vision. It is the card of 'productive solitude' (my favourite term of the year). Lately, as of this year, I find myself being more and more like a hermit - in the positive sense - who has to replenish my energies by being alone and reflecting by myself. Especially with my busy researching and thesis writing schedule these days, I need to recuperate mentally and spiritually - by myself. I like socializing with my friends, and an excuse to get out of the house and have contact with civilization so as not to be entirely isolated - but afterwards I enjoy my time alone to reflect about life, about the future, about spirituality. It's not just about work, but about how I can connect more to my spiritual path. But I understand it all has to come naturally, organically. It can't be pushed, 'it has to come to you' - as my friend Soar says about her meditation experience. This year I've serendipitously come across the area of 'soul potential' and 'soul development' from Ainslie MacLeod's books. And am about to embark on using my card-reading abilities to heal, via Angel Therapy. The wise sage Hermit's wisdom to look inside has paid off.

The Magician: it was my Personality card in the Planetary Spread I did once upon a time. I still find strong resonance with it, and admittedly it is one of my favourite cards in the deck. I like the idea that I can 'make things happen' like the magician. It gives me power; the power of manifestation. Like I can shape my own destiny and choose the life that I want to live. Lately I've been very much into finding out my soul's potential, and what kind of life that I'm meant to live in my present life, thanks to Ainslie's 'The Instruction'. I have a feeling that I'm a Type 9 soul who is vested in constantly improving myself and motivating myself to achieve what I'm meant to be in this lifetime. In reading about my soul's fears (in The Transformation, sequel to The Instruction), I've come to the conclusion that in my past life, my life's plans were curtailed due to various reasons, and I was not able to accomplish what I was here for. Hence the strong feeling now that I have to accomplish something in this lifetime. It doesn't have to be 'big' or immensely lucrative in the most conventional sense, but it has to be meaningful I'm sure. Something that's balanced in terms of material and spiritual, that corroborates my Virgo practicality and Sagittarian ideals. Something like an inspirational educator, as I'm also vested in helping and inspiring other people to reach their full potentials. I believe that only by pursuing your TRUE interests - that you are naturally good at - that you can succeed in life. It is by having the Passion that will propel you to attain your goal. It won't happen for you if you go at it half-heartedly......

These 3 cards: Page of Swords (mental), The Hermit (spiritual), and The Magician (manifestation) are my birthday resolutions for this year, and for my post-Saturn return life to come.

Signs from My Angels

Just read Doreen Virtue's book called Signs From Above (co-written with her son Charles Virtue) in preparation for the impending Angels Certification Programme (ACP) I enrolled in for November! Am so excited! This is my first book I've read on the subject of 'angels' by Doreen Virtue, the one who pioneered the study of 'angel therapy' and the use of 'angel oracle cards'. These are widely in use nowadays and I've had a reading done once in a new age workshop in Hong Kong once upon a time. Don't remember the outcomes as I remember tarot readings, but angel readings are meant to be empowering and uplifting, much like the signs that your guardian angels give you to assure you that you are loved and watched upon.

There are various signs that angels give us on earth, such as clouds in the shape of angels, deceased loved ones or pets, or anything that has significant meaning to you. Even prior to reading the angel book, I would look up at the sky from time to time to check out the shape of clouds, to see if I could make out any extraordinary shapes. I've seen bunnies, dogs, human faces.......countless objects that my imagination could conjure up. I'm sure I've even seen angels, however back then I had no idea what they were. Now that I've read Signs, I realize that those images were more than the product of my hyperactive imagination - maybe they really meant something! Maybe they really were 'signs' that were put into my path in order to tell me something about my life at that particular moment..........

A few days ago, I had just finished reading a quarter of the book when I silently pondered the possibility of receiving a sign from above - I thought to myself: 'how nice would it be to have some affirmation from my angels?' On my way home, I looked up at the sky to see if I can spot any angel-shaped clouds or rainbows. I didn't see anything spectacular. So I walked on........and just as I was about to cross the road in front of a zebra-crossing, I saw a truck pull out of the parking lot, and smack on its side was the Fiorucci logo - two angels with wings! My angels have spoken. Miraculous! Then when I got home I fiddled a bit with this and that, and fished for something to eat and went into my room to rest. After about half an hour or so, I came back out to call my grandma to ask her about something, and as I put down the phone and looked over at the spot where all the mail is put, I found a pamphlet for a beauty parlour - with an image of a cute smiling angel on the cover! OMG! I was truly gobsmacked! Just as the angel book said, one could not help but smile and feel a deep sense of bliss and love when one receives a gift from their angels. I mean, who wouldn't be happy when they see something as divinely cute as an angel motif!?

After having the privilege of receiving TWO signs in one day, I thought I'd do some research on the past, to see if I've missed anything crucial prior to my epiphany. Led by my intuition, I checked my Blackberry pics on my computer, and there it was - a picture I took of a rainbow while I was walking from my college dorm down Hills Road to downtown Cambridge. I remember feeling quite happy and awash with a sense of warmth and relief when I saw the rainbow that day. I must have felt strong emotions, as I was compelled to stop on the street to take a picture of it with my Blackberry! The picture was dated 20 November 2009. It was during my darkest days, when I was feeling depressed, sickly and spiritless. It was a week before my mom was due to arrive in Cambridge to visit me and to help me pack up my belongings to move back to Hong Kong. In retrospect, now I know that the angels meant to tell me that everything will be alright very soon, and I have my mom's visit to look forward to. As it happens, my mom has always been my 'earth guardian angel' - whom I even acknowledged her to be in my MPhil thesis! - and she was coming to 'save' me and to bring me home!!! As it happens, the very next pic on my Blackberry - dated 27 November 2009 - was that of my mom posed in front of the famous Chinese scholar's rock in the backs of King's College. My Earth Guardian Angel. Things really were alright after that.

To conclude my angel musings of the night, I have to tell you that the same evening that I read the angel book, as I was lying on my bed listening to music on my iphone, the first song that came up (on random shuffle mode) was 'Blowing in the Wind' ('the answer my friend is blowing in the wind, the answer is blowing in the wind.....'); followed by 'Top of the World' ('Everything I want the world to be, is now comin' true especially for me, and the reason is clear, it's because you are here, you're the nearest thing to heaven that I've seen......'); and finally - ta-da! - Geri Haliwell's version of 'It's Raining Men' ('It's rainin' men, hallelujah!') Hahahaha! Yes, music is another medium that angels use to deliver signs. Lyrics especially. Having had THREE songs to do with divination, heaven, and men falling out of the sky......I felt truly blessed. The angels had really made my day. The day I picked up Signs and got all those signs was one of the happiest days I've ever had. I can't wait to learn more about angels and healing and am very much looking forward to attending Doreen's course in November!

The Practice of Tarot

Hello summer of 2010! Wow, it's been a whole year since I last posted. I can't believe it's been so long. My last post was on my Saturn Return, so there's no surprise how much has happened to disrupt my publishing plans. While Saturn's effects are slow when you're in the midst of it all (like fighting a never-ending battle!) but once it's over, it's like everything was a dream (a nightmare actually!) and that all is well again - even much, much better - in a blink of an eye! Am so glad I can look back and say it's all over now. I can put the past behind and move forward. Am so touched by the encouragement I've gotten about my blog, so I must continue on my journey of self-discovery by sharing more with you on my beloved subject.

I've discovered a new interest since last summer.....that is the Tarot! I've had a very serendipitous encounter with tarot cards since 5 years ago in 2005. I remember I had always been fascinated by them, and that I've paid to have readings on several occasions in Hong Kong. My friend Nanz, who also read for me, then bought me a pack of Rider-Waite tarot cards for my 25th birthday. But the timing wasn't right, so I didn't pick it up back then. They just didn't translate into any meaning for me. Despite my struggling to decipher the symbols behind my first pack of cards, they just didn't talk to me.....

Then 5 years after I've studied astrology on my own and practised yoga extensively, I felt I needed something more to propel me forward in my spiritual quest. I wanted to know more about the occult and the metaphysical realm. I picked up tarot again. This time I went for the Mythic Tarot, in which I ordered online at amazon.co.uk. It just sounded or 'felt' right. People say that you have to 'feel' the cards to see if they speak to you. Well, in this case, the amazon description by Juliet Sharman-Burke - the creator of the cards - 'felt' right to my ears. So I listened to my intuition and ordered them to be delivered to my college. I was so excited when I got them! I immediately began to read the accompanying book on Greek myths that informed the cards. I felt immediately connected because I had always loved Greek and Roman mythology and it played a big part of my learning process in childhood. Then when I felt more confident with having learnt the general descriptions of the cards, I tried to do some readings for myself. As I gained more confidence, I then tried it on my friends at Cambridge. Then I even branched out to reading for my friends' friends who visited them in Cambridge! I had so much fun learning as I went along, and making my friends bear with me when I had to read and re-read the book to interpret the meanings! I used the Celtic Cross spread - as it was pretty much the only method I knew back then as taught in Juliet Sharman-Burke's book - and it was an intricate spread of 10 cards signifying different meanings in their various positions. I first had to memorize what each position meant, and then try to interpret what each card meant when in those specific positions. Thankfully the Greek Gods and the mythological stories really spoke to me, and I was able to synthesize these symbols in my interpretations. As tarot teachers say, tarot is really about SYMBOLS. You need to relate to the symbols in order to be able to do good/accurate interpretations. Then again, it's not really about 'precision' of such. Not that you can memorize what each card means and regurgitate those in your readings. You need to be flexible and above all - intuitive. It's all about honing your intuition because each question is different and there are so many different ways of interpreting the cards. There's a basic, underlying meaning to each card, but it varies a bit on different occasions. That's the magic of it. That's why not everyone 'knows' how to read the tarot. It requires alot of practice and self-advancement to be good.

Tarot really is a mysterious thing......as I've thought to myself on many occasions: the cards in each spread really do make sense. They do not come up at random. Even if I really did know my symbols really well and was very flexible and eloquent in interpreting the cards, they would've had to 'come up' in a sequence or arrangement that 'made sense' in the first place. For example, if I was asking about my love life, it would be weird if the suit of Pentacles (money) kept coming up and there were hardly any Cups (love) in my spread. Vice versa, if I was asking about my career, and Cups kept coming up, it would be a bit improbable. Of course you can argue that love is linked to money alot of times, or that you are very emotionally invested in your career. But still, it would not make sense if the cards came up completely random in a 10-card spread! Finally I have a story to share, very briefly, as it has to do with the mystery of the cards. It happened during my winter term in Cambridge when I first learnt to read the tarot. I went to my friend WS's house and his friend was there. So I read for his friend, knowing nothing about him or his love life. His question was if he could break up with his girlfriend successfully. The spread turned out to be bordering on random, as there were many Swords and Pentacles and only 1 Cup. On the outset it didn't make sense, and I was a bit gutted and distraught about my tarot reading skills. But after a long time, he finally told me that his 'relationship' was actually a divorce, and that he was seeking a divorce with his wife on the grounds that there was much conflict (Swords) having to do with money (Pentacles). Mystery solved! It made perfect sense! The tarot never lies.......(even if he was keeping this a secret from everyone back then.)

Since then I've been evermore enthused about my readings, both for myself and for others. Of course some made more 'sense' than others, and I've come across many difficult spreads that were extremely hard to interpret. But I'm not deterred. The human psyche is so complex......things are seldom what they seem to be on the surface. My objective is to sift through the layers and discover what's hidden beneath, so as to relieve people, and myself, of our doubts and fears. As tarot teachers say, people already know subconsciously how things will probably unfold, but they need REASSURANCE from external sources to be sure. I totally agree. The Celtic Cross spread helps you arrive at your final destination - the final outcome - via navigating the different stages of the mundane situation/your inner psyche, step by step. That is why the art of tarot can be said to straddle both the psychological and the occult worlds according to Jungian psychologists. I've ordered 2 more sets of tarot cards, one of them is the Legacy of the Divine Tarot illustrated by the famous tarot artist Ciro Marchetti. So excited about the impending delivery! Will share more when I get them.........

Saturn Return Revisited

During the past month I feel as if my life has been turned upside down, and I've been suddenly confronted with a series of expeditious and unexpected events.

There is no doubt that the Saturn Return has struck again.......

Last I checked, which was last week, Saturn had just skimmed past 17 degrees Virgo - which was the placement of my Virgo in my birthchart. This means I was basking under the effects of Saturn directly hitting my birth Saturn during the past few weeks! I fell terribly sick for a whole 3 weeks and could barely sleep a wink. It was terrible, just terrible. I had been sick before, but never before had I felt so sucked out of all reserves of energy. It was one of my weakest moments in life, ever. The feeling was pure helplessness. It's like when you cough and cough and cough, and you're heaving your chest so much that your whole body including your chest, your rib cage and your lower stomach all hurt like hell. It's like when you've done a million sit ups a day or something. (On the good side, I guess my stomach is 'toned'.) During that time I didn't wanna see anyone or eat anything, because my windpipe would get stimulated by the slightest inhalation of air and my throat was itchy at all times. Seriously, even mildly spicy soup made me cough like hell, so all I ate was noodles cooked in chicken broth and unobtrusive sandwiches for the duration of the few weeks. Not being able to consume food freely is the worst ever possible thing that could happen. To eat pleasurably and sleep soundly are the two things I regard as most important in life. Hence it was to my utmost chagrin that both these two aspects were unfulfilled during my bodily ordeal. It was the nightmare of my life. It made me realize that when you are forced to strip down to your bare essential needs, it's health that counts the most. Not anything else, really. Everything else you can more or less control, but a healthy body is something you really can't take for granted; anyone who've got it is truly blessed. From now on, I vow never to inhale anything carcinogenic or vaguely suspect into my lungs ever again. As my faithful Chinese doctor said, 'the lung is the most delicate organ in the body.' So do take good care of it, people.

Health was not the only thing that was under fire. Friendship also took a serious toll. There was a recent falling out with a friend. It was dramatic. Well, I shouldn't blame it all on Saturn Return. But during this time, what is meant to happen will happen. There's no escaping the inevitable during this fateful time. People in your life whom are meant to stay will live through the turmoil and sustain, but those who are meant to play a transient role will fade out eventually. People and places and events are meant to be rather transient during Saturn Return. It's a time for you to learn about what you need and don't need through expedited and intensified experiences and what sustains is what will stay with you for life. At least till the next Saturn Return which is not for another 30 years, in which it will be time again for you to weed out the unnecessary and unwanted in your life. It sounds cruel, this weeding out business, but it actually isn't. Towards the last days of my Saturn Return I've gotten quite used to it now - the transience of life. I've learnt that to hold on to something that's doomed is unhealthy. Tis no wonder that my health also literally suffered during this weeding out process. It's both a physical purging of the body and spiritual purging of the soul.

I've learnt alot through the areas of Health, Relationship, and Work during the past year. I confess that I've had my moments of weakness and wanted to regress.....but on the whole I've encouraged myself to move forward. A friend of mine recently had her 30th birthday, and her life trajectory is very similar to mine in many ways. New country, new career, new boyfriend. (I don't have the latter, although it came sort of close but just fizzled out due to the fact that it was just not meant to be - a classic Saturn Return hallmark that you're suppose to discard what doesn't work; you get it by now.) My 30-year-old friend is not very happy or optimistic about the future. She's not moving forward in confident strides. In a certain way, she's regressing or too stuck in her ways. I'm not gonna say which sign she is, to avoid stereotyping in this instance. But it's a sign that holds on to the past real tight. It's one that wallows in past memories and is reluctant to move on and embrace the new. Comfort-zone oriented. I don't mention the sign because I believe that there is no one such sign that confronts Saturn Return easier or harder. I don't think any astrologer - Stephen Arroyo or anyone else I've read about - have alluded to the difference in reception of different signs. Saturn Return is an objective phenomenon that has to be treated with the same reverence and receptivity for each and every person. There are no exceptions. However, if I were to contribute my opinion, then it's the mutable signs that have an easier time adapting to change, such as the likes of Virgo, Pisces, Gemini and Sagittarius. Although some might say that it may not apply to Pisces, it being water. I'd say the more detached one is, the easier to let go and move on. I seriously hope my friend gets past the psychological obstacles which are holding her back and that she can discard old destructive habits and move forward. It's the only way to go from here, as she's sacrificed so much and left so much behind already. On a more cheerful note, I have another friend who is approaching his 29th year, and he's got it all. New country, new career, new girlfriend. It all looks mighty optimistic to me. He's off to a grand new start after finishing his PhD and is now on his way home to start his new job (and to see his new girlfriend). It is my sincere wish that all members of the Saturn Return Club can have the same optimistic outlook and grand new start as him.

Virgo, Cancer and Scorpio: The Holy Trinity of 'Sense' and 'Sensibility'

Just came back from an excursion to the land of the Scots with two mates from Cambridge. We were one Earth (Virgo) and two Waters (Cancer and Scorpio). The holy trinity of sense and sensibility, as I've just coined us.

The Holy Trinity of Sense and Sensibility embodies the 'sensible' pragmatism of Virgo (Earth) and the 'sensitive' idealism of Cancer and Scorpio (Waters). Pity our Fire (Sagittarius) friend couldn't join; nor could the other Earth-Fire individual (Capricorn-Sagittarius). We are therefore rendered imbalanced in our elemental combination. Having said that, our group had always lacked the Air element anyhow. Surprisingly there aren't any Geminis, Libras or Aquarians I hang out with around here! A far cry from back home in Hong Kong where I kept encountering these Airy individuals and were seriously bereft of my Earthy or Watery kin. Hence I'm not one to complain about the abundance of Earth and Water in my nearest and dearest right now. The Scorpio in question does however, exude a Geminian Ascendant, which supplies the quick-wittedness and resourcefulness that we need on our trip. I suspect (and not just me), that the Cancerian in question also has Air representation in her chart, most likely Gemini as well, due to her friskiness - highly uncharacteristic of the chilled out, retiring Water element. Sociable Gemini cancels out some of her Cancerian shyness I am willing to bet. So far, we'd never know, given her reluctance to divulge her time of birth, with the explanation that she refuses to be 'boxed in' a certain category perhaps due to psychological training. It's worthwhile to note that Jungian psychology drives alot of the theories of famous contemporary astrologers such as Liz Greene, Stephen Arroyo and Howard Sasportas, to name just a few.

Oh well, so the Holy Trinity was quite a success. Earth and Water complement each other perfectly. The Virgo was pleasantly nourished by the emotional bestowments of Cancer and Scorpio. Cancer was very nurturing as usual, and provided excellent hospitality in the physical sense, as we were being hosted by her family in Glasgow. Cancer always tried her best to make sure everyone's needs are taken care of, albeit being a bit stressed out herself because of the need to attain perfection in this realm. On some occasions she was worried that transportation requirements were not met, or that not enough sights had been seen in the motherland. Excessive worrying is a hallmark of Cancer. She reminds me of my other Cancerian mate who resides in London. She's like that too. She tries to accomodate everyone but stresses herself out in the process. I think it would do them good to practice moderation, so as not to build up resentment in the long run. It's a pity to let their kindheartedness get in the way of their personal well being. People appreciate you just the way you are; no need to do extra or compromise your own needs by satisfying others'. There is no perfection, only effort. You try your best, and people will know.

The Scorpio friend I got a chance to know much better during the intense six days of travel. I always labelled her as ethereal, otherwise known as otherworldly. I got to see a more 'worldly' side of her on our sojourn across the Highlands as we braved the perils together, hand in hand. I have a weakness for putting a label on people too rashly. This I owe to the impatience of Virgo. Although it is Earth by nature, it does not exude the gravity of Taurus or the serenity of Capricorn. Virgo is frisky and fidgety thanks to the mercurial nature of it's ruling planet Mercury - which incidentally is also Gemini's ruler. While Mercury and Gemini are a perfect match, it's a mismatch for Virgo; Virgo has the wrong ruler! As the late Linda Goodman constantly forebodes, Virgo has yet to find it's true ruler, Vulcan, who will finally give it the right amount of gusto and fortitude that it needs, that will finally put an end to this nerve-wracking fidgetiness. I have no idea why Virgo has to be imbued with a wrong ruler while Taurus and Capricorn have such suitable ones (sensual Venus and serious Saturn respectively). It's so not fair that we can't be comfortable in our own skins like them.

The Scorpio with a Gemini Ascendant has provided much charm and entertainment throughout the journey. Now I know why people are so drawn to her; it's the magnetism which comes so naturally. When you talk to her, you can feel her intuition brewing. She can feel what you're feeling. It's not phony, while some people keep telling you 'I know how you feel', but you can really feel that she feels with you and for you. The compassion is different from the Cancerian type. Cancer compassion exists on a more mundane level, while Scorpio feeling is more latent and mysterious.....it draws you in. Magic. It's like when I talk to my dad - about substantive personal issues - I can feel him feeling what I feel, in that particular moment. And I feel much better. The soul feels nourished when it is identified with. I suppose that is the ethereal factor that I constantly allude to when speaking of my Scorpio friend. She is ethereal, but not unapproachable. The otherworldiness manifests in her gift of connection with other people.

It is worthwhile to conclude that The Holy Trinity was made up of one Cardinal Sign (Cancer), one Mutable Sign (Virgo) and one Fixed Sign (Scorpio). That's the most ideal case scenario. Cardinal leads, Mutable is the go-between, the communicator, and the Fixed one coordinates and organizes. Considering the circumstances, it is fair enough that the Cancerian leader is the one who is hosting the whole expedition, as we are visiting her motherland and she is the one to lead us to our destinations. Scorpio, meanwhile appearing to be a bit day-dreamy, is actually quite organized and thorough in planning her meticulously coordinated outfits for the journey! What with the Scottie hat and highland maiden's outfit for striking a pose on the top of the hills. They always surprise you, these fixed signs (besides Taurus, who is rather consistent in demeanor and action). Scorpio, Leo, Aquarius - they sometimes seem aloof (Leo always a bit flustered), but they're actually very organized, very prepared, in their own sort of way. My mom (Taurus) worries that my dad (Scorpio) does not know the way to drive to somewhere, and he does make wrong turns (and gets fined occasionally), but he always manages to find the way, in his own time, own accord. No need to worry about these folks. They appear otherworldly, but there's no one who knows better during crucial times. You just have to trust that they make the right judgements. The Scorpio friend will come back safe and unscathed (albeit with a few scars and bumps here and there) from her trip to one exotic locale in Central Asia.

Westside, Friday, 5 June